As adults we are capable of continuing development throughout our lives. We pass through stages, where we see and interpret the world in different ways.
We are capable of moving from ‘primal’, survival thinking to more sophisticated dimensions of mental complexity and meaning.
What would normally trigger our fear, now it can excite us, it can bring the best in us. It is when we feel most alive, creative, fearless. When we author our lives, we find our inner heroes (or heroines), we transform.
The SCARF model, a popular framework in neuroscience, (Status, Certainty, Autonomy, Relatedness, Fairness) shows how our primal brain is hard-wired – where we see things as threats or rewards. It is our ‘default’ operating system.
Yet, we can train our mind to think differently.
Take ‘Certainty’, for example. Whilst we need a certain degree of certainty, we also crave excitement, adventure and growth. We welcome uncertainty and variety as a source of innovation or as an antidote to boredom.
Or think of ‘Fairness’ – usually seen as a fair exchange. Reciprocity. Sure, but is that all? A tit for tat, or quid pro quo? What if you are kind, generous, expecting nothing in return? What if the mere act of doing something for others, especially to those of less privilege, gives new meaning and purpose? Isn’t this true fairness?
So – what really drives you to reach your ‘flow’ state, and grow to your full potential? Let’s use a different lens – think APRIL.
- Autonomy – You are a complete individual, unique, true to yourself. You dare to be different… You perform at mastery levels, yet at the same time you are perfectly synchronised with others, interconnected to something bigger than yourself… It is when you manage to subordinate your ego to your higher self — your inner ‘hero’.
- Passion – You are true to your heart and your impulse voices, you unleash your spirit and your emotions and this way you can ‘infect’ others with your emotions…You live passionately, not just having a passion… You follow your wildest dreams, giving up comfort for doing things that have meaning to you, instead of following common goals for comfortable pleasures, or what others expect from you.
- Risk – You stretch beyond what is ordinary, conventional or comfortable. You search for the new, the different, the surprising in people and in yourself– it is in the adventure, the unknown, the uncharted, where you feel most alive… It is through moving past your fears, when you accept pain or adversity are part of who you are…When too much of comfort or certainty destroys meaning.
- Improvisation – You are agile, adaptive, fluid like water, surrendering instead of forcing, trying to control… You are flexible, you live the moment, you create wonders without script, you go with the flow… You now connect at a different level with others…Your mistakes, or failures are your exciting pathways for something new and unexpected, they are pure gold! This ‘effortless’ improvisation, is backed up by deep, deliberate practice.
- Learning – You don’t stop evolving, you learn at different levels – you don’t just learn things, you learn ‘you’, you change your story. There are continued deaths and rebirths inside you… When you know how to listen, navigate contradictions, when to fight and when to surrender… When you bring with you the sword of a Warrior and the soul of an Artist.
These 5 discoveries, the APRIL Model, give you new possibilities, to live in freedom and creativity.
Where you move forward, you adapt, you use your powers and intelligence not just to survive but thrive. Where you turn challenge and stress to opportunity and advantage.
Never bet on stability, certainty or lasting order. Everything changes.